To The Brink And Back

When an actor is working truthfully, they don’t ‘play’ emotions. You don’t begin a scene by thinking to yourself, “here is where I get really pissed off”, or “here is where I cry”. Rather, you discover what your character is doing. He is defending himself, or he is trying to get the other character to face the facts, or she is trying to get the other character on her side. And people use a whole arsenal of tactics to get what they want. Just think of the last interaction with your boss.

Real emotion, which can occur spontaneously within the actor during a rehearsal or performance is a byproduct of the struggle to achieve those goals. But it is elusive, and the minute you make it your goal, you’ll never find it again.

What is a special challenge with I AM MY OWN WIFE is that one character can be speaking, trying to achieve whatever his or her goal is, and an emotion may begin to manifest itself. As an actor you can’t deny it! You embrace it and continue trying to work toward your goal. You have, for an instant, become that performer who is living truthfully within imaginary circumstances.

But then, and here is where a one-person show is particularly challenging, that scene ends! And in one second, you are another person in a completely different place with a completely different goal. And so the title of the blog. To the brink—leaving one character a wreck—and back. It’s almost like you have to install a sort of air brake that can be applied very quickly. It’s tricky.

How far can you allow an emotion to take you knowing (somewhere in the recesses of your brain) that in a moment you must wipe the slate clean. Good fun. And the best thing is, I get paid for doing this.